And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have ought against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses. But if ye do not forgive, neither will your Father which is in heaven forgive your trespasses. (Mark 11:25-26 KJV)

Forgiveness ranks first among God’s many truths.  Peter proclaimed that God gave Jesus to Israel in order to bring them repentance and forgiveness of sins (Acts 5:31) and Paul declared that the forgiveness of sins was preached through the man Jesus.  I remember back to when I first began to walk with God and recall that that walk did not begin until I became convicted of my sins and believed upon Jesus to forgive those sins.  Hebrews 6:1 teaches that the very first doctrine of Christ is “repentance from dead works.”

Now consider, which comes first, our repentance or Christ’s forgiveness?  We know that Jesus died for our sins two thousand years ago, so his forgiveness seems to come first.  Or, does Jesus forgive us one at a time, that is, did he forgive his apostles when they believed upon him, then Paul later when he believed, and finally us who believed centuries later?  No, I believe that his forgiveness reached forward to us and backward to all who came before him from the very cross that dripped with his blood. So, Christ’s forgiveness comes first.

And is this not just as he teaches us when he says, “And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have ought against any….” Jesus had claims against us, so he forgave us.  Not only did he forgive us, he shed his blood to bring forgiveness and reconciliation to God to us.  But, Jesus continued this admonition saying, “that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses. But if ye do not forgive, neither will your Father which is in heaven forgive your trespasses.”  What?  Jesus forgave our sins unconditionally two thousand years ago, yet his Father will not forgive us until we do something, until we actually forgive every person who has wronged us?  

So, is forgiveness of ours sins by God conditional or unconditional?  If conditional, then I must  repent before Jesus will forgive me, which in turn means that someone who offends me must ask my forgiveness before I have to forgive him.  But, Jesus didn’t say that.  He said, “Forgive others or my Father won’t forgive you.”  So, is forgiveness conditional or unconditional?

Jesus also said, “Therefore if thou bring thy gift to the altar, and there rememberest that thy brother hath ought against thee; Leave there thy gift before the altar, and go thy way; first be reconciled to thy brother, and then come and offer thy gift.” (Matthew 5:23-24 KJV)  Here we see that we must ask for forgiveness.  Why should we?  Isn’t our brother obligated to forgive us unconditionally?

Here we see that repentance, then, is the other side of forgiveness.  It is true that Jesus (God, the Father) forgives us unconditionally and that he forgave us from the foundation of the world, for in eternity his sacrifice has always been accomplished.  It is also true that in eternity each of us have already asked for forgiveness, repented of our many sins, and also forgiven others of their sins against us.  Thus we, each of us, have been forgiven our sins.  But, we live in time and it is in time that God molds us into his image.  Jesus forgives us unconditionally, but that forgiveness does not affect us so long as we remain unreconciled to God.   Reconciliation occurs when we repent, when we come into agreement with God, his requirements, his ways.

An example may help us see this.  Suppose you have a very young child who throws a tantrum. You go to him, pick him up, and say, “Billy, don’t do that.”  Immediately he stops crying.  He may have been wrong and even sinful in his behavior, even for a very young child, but he stops his tantrum and you immediately forgive him.  Now suppose it’s twelve  years later and you find that he has been torturing your barn cats and enjoys doing it.  You reprimand him.  He sulks and says he’s sorry, but you know he only said it because he was found out.  You forgive him then, but is the forgiveness complete?  Next week you find him hurting a little kitten.  You already forgave Billy for such behavior; what do you do now?  Isn’t he still forgiven in your heart?  Of course he is, but now forgiveness demands that Billy be punished.  It also demands that Billy show the fruit of repentance.

And so it is between God and us.  Yes, he has forgiven us.  But, if we sin wilfully after we have received the knowledge of the truth, there remains no more sacrifice for sins, (Hebrews 10:26 KJV).  In other words, Christ’s forgiveness avails us nothing so long as we walk in willful sin.  And yet, still he has forgiven us!

This reveals the two sides of forgiveness.  First, we, like Christ, must forgive one another.  Second, for this forgiveness to be effective, the wrongdoer must repent. Someone may do me a grievous wrong.  And I may (and should) truly forgive that one.  If that one does not repent and apologize for that wrong, then my forgiveness toward them is meaningless so far as they are concerned.  (On the other hand, my being willing to forgive is good for me.  It keeps me from acquiring a hard heart of bitterness)  But if I have forgiven, and the wrongdoer remains unrepentant, our fellowship can never be restored, even if we do things together again.  The restoration comes when one forgives and the one forgiven repents.  Forgiveness and repentance thus make two sides of the same coin.